But I still like the idea of resolutions, so I am not giving up at trying to reform my wayward soul. Actually, after watching the 7th part of the Catholicism series last night on saints, I'm inspired. Fr. Barron comes down hard on those of us who excuse ourselves from trying to be a saint because we can't see how we compare to the giants of faith. He urges us to reject spiritual mediocrity, or at least to give up making excuses for not trying to be a saint. So after watching this dvd, I realize I really should resolve to
1. Refocus yet again on loving God and my neighbor, especially, as Mother Teresa reminds us,* the neighbors who live in my house. Which in practical terms, means ... um.... responding with love ...hm ... maybe what I should work on is affirming others. I often forget to dole out praises, among other ways in which I fail to love without limit.
and 2. Read more Edith Stein and finally read Story of a Soul.
So those are my Spiritual goals. I figure my list of books to read lays out some Intellectual goals. I am still waiting to hear if I am going to get to teach a class next semester, but even if I don't, I want to reread another Shakespeare play, yet to be determined, and Oedipus Rex. And I'm working on my syllabus. I keep getting sidetracked by good quotes and diversions. I have to thank Sally, I think, for the recommendation of Perrine's Sound and Sense. A very sensible literature textbook. Love it. Another little gift to myself.
On to Practical Goals: First and foremost, I am resolving to drink more water. Water, water, water. I am vowing to drink at least one glass of water for each cup of coffee, plus water at every meal. When I was in training mode back in college, I used to keep a water bottle with me at all times. I would drink 3 or 4 20 oz. glasses of water or diet sprite mixed with cranberry juice at every meal in the olde dining hall. Back in my nursing days, I was always thirsty, so I did a little better, but I've realized lately that I can go all day drinking nothing but coffee. Not advisable in a climate where the temps never dip below 75. Wrinkles are showing up everywhere, which reminds me of those articles about supermodel health secrets: They all listed drinking water as their secret weapon against aging. I'm probably too late to slow the aging process, but at least I can try to avoid getting dehydrated on a trail run.
If I can keep up with watering myself, I think this will be the year I start increasing my mileage running. I'm already doing a bit more, but I think one of these days I'm going to do either a half or full marathon. I have run one of each, and still remember the emotional high of completing them, although I think I have forgotten most of the pain. I realize this is not a very forceful statement of intention because it could conflict with resolution number 1. The catch: finding time to train without taking away from family and reading time. Too many good things in life.
Finally, I'd also like to get involved in some kind of community service project. I truly miss our visits to the nursing home back in Mississippi, and my minimal work with St. Vincent de Paul, where I answered phones and listened in to the always interesting conversations of the clients. I also admire a friend here for being involved in foster care. Our Thanksgiving service with Salvation Army was a good time, but it was a one-time event. I haven't yet figured out where my place is, and "volunteerism" is not a big movement here. I miss being a part of a parish in the community, although I think we're in the right place in the chapel on base. Excuses, excuses, I know. So I resolve to come to a resolution about this resolution soon.
*The quote from Mother Teresa: It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home for this is where our love for each other must start.
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