Renvoye

The roadweary travelers have returned.  Logged over 5000 miles on the odometer of the Suburban.  Nine passengers, ages 3 months to 41 years, survived and even enjoyed each other's company. I didn't finish half the books I brought to read, and I know that at least one bag of books I packed didn't get touched. But media usage wasn't excessive.  Lots of staring out windows and listening to music and enforced family togetherness time, most of it pleasant. I admit I was the thorn one late evening when our accommodations weren't what I expected. (Note to self: it is considerably cheaper to stay in Winslow, AZ, than Flagstaff.)  We are not too scarred from the trip, except that with just about 300 miles left to go, a rock bounced and hit our windshield and left a pock and a crack that we watched grow from a few centimeters in length to several inches as we drove. The challenge was to watch the road and not the crack.  At that point it was dark, and our view of the desert was impaired anyway.

The summary: This was the baby's first grand tour to meet the extended family.  Six of the kids and I flew to Indiana late in June.  One of the teenagers went on a mission trip to an Indian reservation in New Mexico with the church youth group, so he and my husband drove out together a few days after we left. My oldest son elected to work at his life guard job instead of going on the mission trip, although I think he would have enjoyed it since they mostly did construction work.

The flight went smoothly, other than a hiccup at the beginning when our flight was delayed over an hour. We hung out at the USO after checking our bags. Thank goodness for the USO - I never really knew what they did before we went to Guam.  Staffed mostly by retirees, they provide drinks, snacks, toiletries, reading material, computers, movies, showers, and sleeping rooms for traveling service members and their families.  Not as luxurious as the First Class lounge, I imagine, but a lot friendlier.

Since we were traveling with Baby, we were welcome to board early, which is a big deal on Southwest because we all got to sit together.  Kids were great on the plane, including Baby.  In fact, she was an ideal traveler the entire trip.  Just the right age - big enough not to be fragile, small enough not to feel trapped in a car seat.  She even took a bottle while on the road, so I didn't have to lean over the carseat and nurse her as I have done in years past to sooth a sad baby when my husband wasn't ready to make a rest stop. And she learned to suck her thumb after we lost her binkie. Our first thumb sucker.

We made it to Indiana, where we had a wonderful week with my side of the family. Lots of cousin time. Celebrated birthdays and baptisms. Played in the mud. Constructed forts. Drank a lot of coffee and chatted a lot on porch swings. Went thrift store shopping more than once.  Walked down country roads.  Admired spacious blue skies and starry nights.  Rode horses.  Ate honey. Picked green beans. Cut down trees. Soaked in the greenery and the rain and the flowers. Fit in a couple of college tours. Talked more and drank more coffee. I love that place and those people.

All in all, one of the more relaxing visits with my side of the family. I've noticed that our family visits usually begin with exhilaration heightened by travel exhaustion, followed by a day or so of awkwardness or rough-edged, slightly guarded conversations, before we settle into the deep familiarity of familial comfort. This year we settled in sooner than in years past. The kids, other than a couple babies, are all pretty self-reliant or willing to be guided by their older siblings. They don't require a lot of parental attention (except when over-indulging in body humor). No one was sick or injured.  Having heard plenty of stories of unhappy families, I am beyond grateful for close relationships with parents, siblings, cousins, and in-laws.

Here are more than a few photos from the first stage of our journey in Indiana. As you can guess by the numbers of photos, I can't get enough of this place.  My sister also shared good photos. Stage two, Oklahoma, land of the free and the brave, was equally full of quality time with loved ones - more photos to come.

Flat Stanley came on the trip.

He loves the luxury of flying, especially with bargain prices!

The 19 biological grandchildren. The 2 stepgrandkids weren't able to come this year.

Chubby baby laughs for Nana, her delivery nurse.

Babies love smaller babies.

The landmark oak.

Farm chores are more fun.

Tree removal service

The idea was to remove the tree so it wouldn't land on the house in a storm.

Instead it almost landed IN the house.

Only a few shingles were lost.  Getting to use power tools makes everyone forget their frustration.

"California moms." This is a version of dress up where you find bright makeup, fancy shoes, and stylish bags. Big sunglasses not pictured. 

Two cousins share a birthday - and both like sports better than make-up (that's a field hockey puck on the right.)

Baby love

Practicing for survival.

A woodland fort takes shape.

Five year old with loppers.

Look carefully to see the bee swarm around the crabapple tree. An amazing process to watch the bees
leave their hive and fly in a cluster to a new home.

A sugar trap lures the bees here. What I don't have a good photo of is the bees hanging from a little oak
halfway through their journey. They looked like a growth.

Laura Catherine Jane becomes a Christian!

The fam. Wish someone would have told the fifth child to tuck in his shirt and
told me to fix that flip on the back of my hair. . .

Sons with our daughter and new goddaughter/cousin.

The shed.

Baby bunnies.

Riding the Haflingers. They prefer to pull wagons.

Mmmm, blackberries.

Oxeye daisies

Daylilies

Delphinium

The Galloway herd is growing.

Stocking the hayloft with spring's first cut.

Rocket blast!

Fungus among us.

Good night to another good day. Love this view.

Frog and salamander momentarily trapped. The "zoo" at the fort
also included a little snapping turtle, a box turtle, and a crawdad.

Monarch on milkweed

Centerpiece at the fort.

A belated portrait in the Christening gown, handmade by a friend for our fifth.

The ongoing euchre tournament.

Honeycomb

Mr. McGregor at work

Teddy at play

More honey. Liquid gold

Yay, America! A pre-Fourth celebration

Last stop in the Midwest: a quick jaunt off the interstate to see where my grandfather's mother and grandparents are buried. My aunt has been working on the family history.

Daily Distractions

What I've been thinking about lately:

1. Baptism: We started talking about godparents for the new baby the other day. We have some good options amongst our family members, but soon we have to make a decision. Decisions are very hard for me, so I always appreciate when we have limited options. Fortunately and unfortunately we know a lot of practicing Catholics who would be wonderful godparents. We have always stuck with family members because we want our kids to know their godparents and you never know which friends you'll keep in touch with for the rest of your life. Sadly, a few of the kids' godparents have fallen away from the Church as they've grown older, so we've grown more cautious.  Is it possible to pick new godparents? I have a little superstitious fear that my children's faith might be weakened by the lack of praying godparents, but rationally I know that's silly. I really appreciated the import that the role of godparents received in Guam -  godparents were expected to help raise the child not just in the faith but financially.  I wonder if this commitment made godparents more hesitant to accept their responsibility.  Did anyone ever say, "You know, my faith isn't really that firm right now; I appreciate the honor, but why don't you choose someone else?"

Also, it is interesting to me the way each parish has a different number of hurdles to leap before receiving this sacrament. I talked to the deacon yesterday about what this parish requires: an interview, application, affadavit that at least one of the godparents is baptized Catholic, confirmed, and in a regular marriage, attendance at a class, and a copy of the birth certificate. After all this, you can sign up for one of two weekends a month when community baptisms are held. Of course, in emergency and special situations, exceptions can be made, but the deacon made the point that baptism is an opportunity to welcome young families back into practicing their faith if they haven't been active.

Or it could scare them away.

At the other end of the spectrum: at my parents' small church where three of our kids were baptized, we just had to call in and find out if the weekend we wanted was available. Showed up at the Church, received the sacrament, went home and had a party.

Our first two kids were baptized during Mass on Easter Sunday at two different churches. Both of these pastors loved the idea of having an infant baptism as a part of the ceremony.  One of the parishes had a brand new baptismal font, so our son was the first to be baptized in it (no adult baptism's the night before at the Vigil).  The priest wanted to fully immerse him nekkid, which scared me - what if he polluted the water!! - but my fears weren't realized.  I had to leave Mass to get him dressed and nursed afterwards, but it ended up being a beautiful experience. All the church ladies came up to us afterwards to tell us how much they loved it.

2. College: Everyday we get new fliers in the mail for our high schoolers. Some - many? - of these places I've never even heard of. We did just get an ad for summer school at Harvard - thanks but no thanks! But the endless barrage makes me aware of how many options there all - that and the 1000 pages of the Peterson's college guide. (Picked up the 2011 version for $1. Mostly the same info as the $26 2014 version, right?) My mom sent the ISI Guide to colleges for "conservatives and old-fashioned liberals."  PSAT scores just came back and our junior will take the SAT soon.  The school the boys go to always has a counselor's page in their monthly newsletter devoted to listing scholarship opportunities  (from lots of $500 options to $40000 from the GE-Reagan Foundation and Edison International.) and upcoming visits from college reps. This month there were 4 pages of counselor notes. 'Tis the season for making decisions about where to apply.

This is somewhat terrifying to me. On the one hand, you have my husband who applied to one school, got in, got a full ride from ROTC, found a wife and a career and a passion for architecture and his faith, and never looked back. On the other hand, I am haunted by visions of thousands of indebted, faithless, hungover, STD riddled, poorly educated, unemployed, directionless recent college applicants. Choosing a college may be one of the last big decisions I get to help my sons make.  What if we make a mistake?

I know in my heart there isn't necessarily one perfect place for each kid. Many colleges would nurture their hearts, minds, and souls, or, if they choose a secular school, many places have  Newman centers or church communities that would feed their souls while they learn.  And the tuition? I'm still optimistic about aid. Maybe blindly so.

This topic is sure to occupy more of my attention as the year goes on.

3. Our first parents: We've been going to a small group meeting on the Catholicism series by Fr. Barron at our parish.  Every other Saturday we meet to watch a part of the videos, have wine and cheese, and talk about the questions in the study guide. Last Saturday's session was about Aquinas' proofs from God, and one of the questions led to a discussion of Genesis and evolution. I said something about reading the Genesis account figuratively. I'm no creationist, and it seems to me that the order of creation in Genesis seems to correspond with roughly the story of creation told by secular scientists: light and darkness, land and water, fish and birds, land animals, people. But one member of our group declared, "Well, you have to believe in the Adam and Eve" and referred to Humani Generis, Pope Pius XII's document from 1950.  Both his tone and positivism irked me a bit, so I did a little research.

Here's what I found:
A summary of a priest from Berkeley's thoughts.

The Catechism: "How to read the account of the fall

390 The account of the fall in Genesis 3 uses figurative language, but affirms a primeval event, a deed that took place at the beginning of the history of man.²⁶⁴ Revelation gives us the certainty of faith that the whole of human history is marked by the original fault freely committed by our first parents.^265"

Here is a nice summary from Catholic Answers that corresponds to how my thinking on the topic has been formed.  In summary, it suggests that Catholic teaching allows that the human body could have developed over time, but that the human soul was and is created immediately by God.  Still posits the First Parent argument, without which, the doctrine of original sin is called into question. So to me both science and faith leave open any definitive explanation of the coming into being of humanity. We receive our physical traits from our parents but our souls come from God. So at what point in history did God create the first human soul?

Fr. Longenecker's more vernacular explanation.

If I think about this too hard, my head begins to spin. And to what extent does the timing of creation really matter?  Sometimes I wonder if my faith suffers from a tendency to de-personalize God, to make Him into a metaphor.  I don't hesitate to believe that God exists, but I struggle to identify with or to feel the loving language of relationship with God that some writers use, as is the idea that "God wills" certain events. I prefer "God allows." But "I prefer" sounds so ego-centric.  Humility in this: "I don't know."

4. Downton Abbey: I think I'm done with this show. We watched the first episode of Season 4, and then I read spoilers about the 2nd. I don't think I want to commit any more time to watching. I'd rather read a good book.  And then the high schoolers have gotten into watching BBC Sherlock Holmes episodes, which are pretty fun, too.

5. Interesting articles about literature I came across lately:  http://www.patheos.com/blogs/goodletters/2014/01/the-contemporary-novel-of-belief-part-2/
http://dgmyers.blogspot.com/2014/01/academe-quits-me.html

Both of these are two part posts.

And now to get back to work on more pressing things, like dishes and laundry.