Life of the party

My daughter’s First Communion is quickly approaching – it’s this Saturday, and it looks like a party is not happening. The Church has a nice reception after the Mass, but the three other families I invited over for lunch are unavailable. Most of my girl’s classmates have family of their own in town – and it’s hard to invite one or two and not all.




So it may be just us going out to a special lunch.



On the one hand I’m relieved not to have to prepare lunch for 30. But on the other hand, the celebration deserves the glory of a spread of foodstuffs and pretty napkins and a bouquet for the table. But even a bouquet feels out of reach since we have no blooming flowers in the yard (except a couple pincushion scabiosa), unless it’s a purchased one, which doesn’t feel as fret with love.



Once I read an article (Where? by whom? in one of the politico-religious magazines like Crisis or First Things, but I can’t remember exactly who or where – for some reason I think it was Rachel Teti. In our old house I know it was a in a stack under my bedside table, but after we moved, things like that are still missing.) about preparing for celebrations. It was published probably around Christmastime or maybe Easter, when everyone is rushing about trying to get ready for an Event. And the column was responding to the criticism of this behavior, by saying that a little bit of work, a little sacrifice, a little fasting, is necessary for a celebration.


Sometimes it seems like people don’t want to have parties anymore because it is too hard to prepare them. Or they have big elaborate parties, like a wedding, and don’t enjoy them. The challenge is letting go of the planning when the celebration is taking place. (By the way, I did enjoy my wedding – my grandfather said it looked like I had more fun than anyone else there. The groom had a good time, too, I think. An advantage to marrying young: no pressure for a fancy wedding.)


There was a paragraph in my Bible study book by Priscilla Shirer that reflected on how we often pray to ask God what we should DO, or we fret about how we should discern and live out our calling. But sometimes we need to respond to our calling as an invitation.  We don't need to take over the planning and preparation; we just need to show up to the celebration and participate. Be happy that we’re here. Trust that God has a vision for it all.
That struck a chord.


So I’m going to show up to the First Communion celebration and enjoy it and not worry about popping a ham or a casserole into the oven before we scoot out the door. Will try not to take too many photos, but instead stay recollected on the unfolding of the Mass. Of course, I’m probably now putting the emotional energy I might have spent on a party into deciding on a dress – one I made, with bunchy shoulders and bad buttonholes, one she wore in a wedding that’s ivory, or one off the sale rack at TJ Maxx that’s glittery. My daughter changes her mind daily and so do I. Ah decisions… easier for boys.