What I learned at Bible study

What do you say when someone you barely knows tells you about her cheating husband? Is “I’m sorry” enough? That's all I could manage when a lady I had just met told me about her husband's affair.  I didn't have any advice to give, a little like Lucas in Go Down, Moses, although lately marriage has been a topic of reading material and conversation, and I don't think she wanted any.

This confession about adultery occurred at an ecumenical Bible study I’ve been attending for the last few weeks. The group is rather large, and the material, a study by Priscilla Shirer, Beth Moore, and Kay Anderson, the three big Lifeway ladies, requires about an hour to get through, so time for personal sharing is limited. But plenty is shared in the few minutes available.

I initially wasn’t sure if this group was right for me. The women all seemed familiar with the authors and were able to quote Scripture verses when they offered responses to the study questions. And they are almost all Southern Belle stylish: jeans, high heels, hi-lights in the hair. (Except the ones over 65, who are graciously stylish in a mature fashion.) But appearances aside, the other ladies are a sincere group, full of a desire to share in each other’s sufferings and provide shoulders to cry on, because it seems everyone has a sob story to tell.

I always leave each week amazed at the number of broken people out there, disguised by smiles, stylish clothes, and a gaggle of friends.

First we pray for the sick, the list of which keeps getting longer each week: an aunt with cancer, a cousin with heart disease, a baby hospitalized with a blood infection, an alcoholic son, a co-worker with leukemia. My own extended family list includes family members with heart disease, ALS, MS, multiple miscarriages, depression, joint problems, and other age related disabilities.

Then there are the infidelities: husbands, children, family members who have turned away. Cases of abuse. Carnal sins of the past. Abortions.

When the lady sitting next to me told me her husband was having an affair, she made an interesting observation, saying, “I used to be one of those people who would blame the wife. But now I know that this is spiritual warfare. I would’ve thought my husband would’ve sooner had relations with a dead deer than another woman, but his heart has turned away from God. It’s not about her or me, but him and God.”

And so she prays for him, and we pray for her and her kids.

All of these stories that are shared remind me again and again how blessed I am. Tomorrow I could lose all of these glories: health, children, husband, life. One of the most memorable bits from this Bible study came from the section by Priscilla Shirer, who quoted Charles Hummel, saying, "Don't let the urgent things crowd out the important things."

Last Sunday’s gospel from Matthew has been relevant this week, at this Bible study, while subbing at the elementary for a teacher whose father is dying, while answering phone calls at St. Vincent de Paul. Who doesn't need to be told, "Do not worry about your life,what you will eat or drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?  . . . Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.  Sufficient for a day is its own evil.”

This wronged woman, who is able to get herself up, dressed, and out about town, seems to be taking these words to heart and coping with her husband's infidelity pretty well without additional advice from me or the Bible study leaders.  What could measure up to the gospel?


So I haven't memorized any new scripture verses while attending this Bible study, but these stories of woe confirm the gospel reminder not to fret about what is lacking, but rather rejoice in what is present.