What a contrast to this time last year! I was feeling sick to my stomach regretting the decision we'd made to rent this house with all the dangers - the pool, the busy street, the widely spaced banisters on the upstairs hallway. . . And I was regretting public school, although even the Catholic schools have issues with friends, social media abuse, and also alcohol and cliques... But I do like the teachers and administrators at the public high school. And I have met some really nice potential new friends - or at least acquaintances that are good people who are also sending their high schoolers to the public school, too.
The one child in Catholic school is the least happy about back to school days. I almost pulled her out this spring. But at the end of the school year, I sat in the all school Mass and felt grateful to be participating in the faith as a community, and paid the tuition deposit that day. I am still unsure of the decision and occasionally contemplate home schooling her for a year or two, especially since my favorite teacher at the school pulled her kids out to home school them this year. Not a sign of a healthy school, right? Plus the fifth graders all just got ipads, which are already a distraction and malfunctioning. But inertia is difficult to overcome. And I was not the best teacher the last time I homeschooled. I looked forward too much to the time after lunch when my "teaching" was done for the day.
I was halfway hoping we would be moving next summer, but the whisper is that my husband will receive follow on orders. I am happy for my high schooler. The kids love it here; they love their freedom and the ability to walk to playgrounds and to free movies on the base and to hang out with friends without recruiting a mom to drive. My emotions are mixed, and going back to the Midwest for a time with the extended family always amplifies these uncertainties. But we don't really have a choice or control over the matter right now. In five years we might have more say in where we go, if my husband doesn't think the next promotion will happen. Still a long way away, but becoming more real.
Over the weekend, I was talking to my mom on the phone and sirens started blaring. Emergency vehicles and police careened onto our street and stopped a few doors down. My nosy ten year old went out to see what she could see, but dinner was almost ready, and I was afraid it was a domestic dispute because of the number of police cars.
It turns out the emergency vehicles were tending a 51 year man, apparently supposed to be in great shape, who had just died of a heart attack. They didn't make it in time to save him. He had a high school aged son in boy scouts with my sons and a middle school daughter, but he was alone at the time and found by a real estate agent coming over to list his house for sale. I suspect the police were there in full force because his wife had worked for the police department here, part of a small cadre of officers. I didn't know them, but it is the kind of news that unsettles you, makes you realize the temporality of things. We also saw a bad accident on our road trip. There was the girl who was hit while riding her bike in front of our house. I received word that my track coaches' wife was killed by a car while she was riding her bike. We can't live in fear of death, but it is coming.
I just finished Thornton Wilder's Bridge Over San Luis Rey, which is about the same idea - why do apparently good people- and some bad - die for no reason? Wilder saves their stories and memorializes them. Quotes coming. Just not right now because it is time for bed.
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| Can you see the flecks of gold in the sand? |
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| Unknown flower at the park; photo taken by my child |
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| Orchid show |
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| Sand castle show |
2 comments:
Well, you titled this post "positive Interactions" then left me with a list of recent deaths. I feel let down.
Hmm, that's what happens when I think I'll post something quickly on my blog about how nice it has been to meet all these nice people and nice teachers, but wait till bedtime to write a meandering post that doesn't end nicely where it was meant to. Do you wait to write when your thoughts are collected or is something better than nothing?
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