Beginning again

Hello, 2017.  You seem to have arrived early. I'm not quite ready to move on yet...

I would quite happily dwell in the past if I could.  The older kids and I have been watching The Crown about Queen Elizabeth II's ascension and coronation in the 50's.  With the youngers, we are almost finished with the 7th of 9 seasons of Little House on the Prairie. I'd gladly time travel to either of these vastly different worlds, despite the dangers and difficulties of life those many years ago.  I'm sure someone will look back on the current years and similarly wish he could return to them. Maybe. It certainly must be a good sign that throwbacks like record players, dial phones, and paperback books are making comebacks, at least as hipster Christmas gifts.  My own kids got a lot of socks and hats for Christmas.

So perhaps one of my resolutions for 2017 should be letting go of some of the "might have beens," along with the "still might bes," that I hold on to.  Allowing those daydreams of "better days" and unrealistic expectations to co-exist with the "what really is" usually means the "what really is" looks a little tarnished and undesirable, even though the possibilities are really usually impossible and sources of regret or disappointment.

Along with the New Year's  cleaning out of unused clothes (each kid picked out 5 things to pass on) shoes that are too small, extra canned goods, worn out sheets and towels, unplayed with toys, unread books, etc, I plan to clean out some left over regrets.  Easier said than done, however.

An easier resolution this year: Say something nice to each of the kids every day.  I did not do very well with most of my resolutions from last year, which were similar to years before, so perhaps I need to resolve to do simpler things.  I did succeed at a couple of things: I got the piano tuned and finally found a teacher, who has come 3 times. It's a start.  I also started blessing the kids when they go to school and hugging them more. I  have failed to do daily Gospel reading, to drink more water and cut sugar, and to read aloud more, my resolutions for several years. Time for something new. I did read more spiritual books because of my book club.  I did not do a very good job of managing media, either, but am still holding firm in not getting smart phones for the kids until they graduate from high school.

We have done some family mission work, but have failed to start something consistent.  After reading Tom Hoopes's What Pope Francis Really Said I feel newly committed to doing this.  I'd like to live some of the phrases that jump out to me from the book: culture of encounter, charism of encouragement, radical conversion.  Saying something nice to each kid daily is a way to incorporate encounter and encouragement, but  I need to extend to others, also.  So I hereby resolve to

1. Family goal: Say something nice daily to the kids  (and read more to them). The challenge will be remembering - and what to do for the college kids - a weekly note in addition to the weekly phone call? This goal is an effort to build a "charisma of encouragement" in our own family, which can often be more critical than affirming.
2. Spiritual goal: Go to adoration. (and read the Bible more). Try to make it to the small group meetings my husband and I signed up for. We've been once. Our group is a more mature crowd - older than us by a decade or more, but I enjoyed it, and I think going is a good date night, plus preparation for Sunday Mass with a Gospel reflection, and a way to be invoked in our community in a different way. Meets the "culture of encounter" goal.
3. Academic goal: Work on course readings. Write more. Engage with my students - use their names a lot. Teaching on-line makes it harder to make connections. I think I sometimes am too easy in my grading, which is sometimes a disservice, so I'm resolving to be more honest, but also to give more concrete suggestions for improvement, while being as personal as I can behind a computer screen.
4. Health and wellness: Keep up the strength training I started doing a boot camp type workout with some other neighborhood moms. Fun for LCJ and me. Keep stretching. (and drink more water and lose five pounds!)

Simple.  Now the trick is to not forget them!

Notes and pictures from Christmas and reflections on reading Hillbilly Elegy  to come.