Recognition

Last night I was in the middle of an evening run through the neighborhood, when I had one of those moments of recognition that all was well.  I felt at home.

What is it that clicks, that says this is home finally? We've lived here about the right amount of time - four months or so since we moved in. We can't really say we are new anymore. I know my way around town. I know these roads. I know how long it takes to run from the bridge to the beach and home again.

Maybe I felt at home because a relaxed and filling Thanksgiving weekend capped off a relaxed fall vacation for the kids that included a trip back to the old neighborhood and their old school to see the friends they have missed, a visit we postponed until we knew they had friends here to come back to. This year we tried something new and let the kids each make their favorite side dish.  They each added some little flair that personalized their recipes - the cranberry sauce went into a mold, the rolls were shaped like hedgehogs, the fresh green beans were steamed with bacon grease, the cherry pie had nutmeg and almond extract, the corn pudding had creamed corn made in the blender... it was all delicious.

Maybe I felt homey because it was dusk, just when the newly hung Christmas lights were coming on, that time of day when you can peek into people's homes and see their Christmas trees and bookshelves and art on the walls, because they haven't thought to close the curtains yet.  Everyone looked warm. And I timed my run just right to watch the sun sink below the ocean's horizon along the boardwalk.  The tide was so far out, I could easily run along the beach in the glowing golden reflection of the sunset on the wet sand.

Maybe the feeling was nostalgia from getting out the Christmas ornaments and putting up a tree. This is perhaps the earliest we have put up a tree, but it was the first Sunday of Advent, and this will be a short Advent. I had to find the wreath in the unpacked Christmas boxes. I still need to buy candles because I can't find the ones I thought I kept - for now we are lighting an old red taper I scrounged up.

Maybe it is anticipation, for our oldest son to be coming home FINALLY, for visiting cousins, for parents coming to see us and where we live, for Advent liturgies and music, for Lessons and Carols, for parties and cookies, for the goodwill that seems to exist more than usual among the siblings, for the fun of setting out the nativity for the baby, for the centering around home that happens at Advent and Christmas, for the celebration of the Feast of the Incarnation.  It is the time of year for familiar people and stories and songs and foods.  For repeating familiar rituals that make the time and the place festive.  It is a time of year for recognizing those we love and for being recognized.  Known and re-known.  Reminded again and again of how Love is incarnated for us and in us, filling us so that we overflow with this sense of peace, of being in a place we know, with people we love, in shared anticipation of the Beauty to come, of a future and forever home.